Surrendering

Some days you wake up and expect a completely normal day. I did that Tuesday. Woke up early, got myself ready, waited for Faye to wake up then ran off to church to be late for our weekly staff meeting. Being a children's ministry director isn't easy. In fact it's extremely hard. You can rarely do anything right while expected to make Sunday mornings flow effortlessly and graceful. Those two words shouldn't ever go together. I averaged going to church to sit in a service once every 6 weeks, no one wanted to volunteer, and worst of all I got very little support and encouragement. There came a time where I think I stopped hearing the few "thank yous" because I seemed to stay in trouble. I had the same few people complain about the way I was or wasn't doing things. It was no longer a passion. Church was a chore. I dreaded going. But seeing all the kids enjoy the things I was doing made it worth it. I really loved it. I loved working at church during the week and watch things grow. I'm not an organized person, but I love to organize. So I had fun. I loved being with our secretary all morning. We really grew close. I know I wasn't a good example to her though because I had become so negative. Soooooooooooooooo negative. I'm not good at hearing things behind the scenes at church and being able to shake them off by Sunday morning. I really try but I'm not good at it. So knowing what people were really like then seeing their "Sunday morning face" made me quite bitter. So Catrina's example of a christian woman was watching me have a fit when someone didn't show up for children's church or hearing that someone else tattled on me or a kid leaving a mess and parents didn't make them clean up. She saw a great example of a christian woman in need of a savior. That's me!

My name is Laura, and I need Jesus.

So here we are Tuesday morning. I haven't been to big church in a month. I'm discouraged and ill and frustrated. The other staff never have to miss church. I'm at church till late working on this and that. So I express that. I express that I want help from our leadership. It is then that it was suggested that I take a step back from my position as the Director of Children's Ministry. It was hard news to take for sure. We need the money. That paycheck paid for our house. I go home and tell Denny and we instantly started thinking and praying about other plans.

It's funny how when you pray about things and they get answered you have this shocked feeling inside. Like you can't believe what you prayed for is actually happening. Well, you prayed about it right? God sometimes answers "Yes" and sometimes even "Right now". My dear friend Jessica Lauren recently moved to Ohio to be with her husband. She was looking for a job and found Mary Kay. A week after all of this happened she came to Alabama to do a party and tell us about her new business. I just wanted to see her. I had no intention of starting my own business. National Sales Director Diane Detesco, was doing the party for her. The way she spoke so positively about the business was very intriguing. I've heard lots of different things about Mary Kay and companies like them. Most of them were negative. But Diane's take on Mary Kay spoke straight to me. What I loved most was that it's a christian company and I can make as much money as I want. So I can get us by for now and then there's a potential to make a whole lot more. My first thought is that I can be the stay at home mom that I really want to be for forever! If I'm making what I was making or more while teaching then why would I go back? I'll have the freedom to take my babies to school and pick them up, I can be at their school for all events and I can work at my own schedule. All of this ran through my head in a matter of seconds as I was making over my face. So I left that day with a new hope. I wasn't scared anymore. God so quickly answered the prayer we were searching for. I researched for a couple of days before bringing it up to Denny. I wanted to have all of my ducks in a row before I brought it up to him. He was instantly for it and has been supper supportive. We're on board and ready to get started. I can't wait to see where Mary Kay takes us and the opportunities that will come from it!

So, if you woke up today in fear with very little hope, remember who Jesus is and the promises He has given us. He will not leave us without hope. Ever. He may not answer our prayers in the time we would prefer but he always answers them perfectly. I lost sleep for days and at just the right time God provided the perfect answer for this season. New things are scary but it's only because we don't know what to expect. I don't doubt for a second that this is God's plan. The timing has made that evident. There's no reason to worry or fear. It's all going to be ok.. Mary OKay :)